Woah

Sent from my iPhone

i found a lump. and i am freaking out. oliver is driving me insane, and i don't know what is going on with my love life. i feel hopeless. woe is me.

Home is wherever I'm with you.

The only thing keeping me from going completely awol is love.
If Ollie weren't here, this Christmas may be the saddest one yet. Without him, I'd be listless and dull. I love that he keeps me smiling. I need him.
It's kind of strange living with another family. No matter how much I care for them, this "situation" is taking its toll on my mind.
Hopefully, seeing my family (and my Stephen) will pull me out of this funk.
Oliver is my light, and he'll help me get through the dark.

X
a

Salvation Song

Listening to The Avett Bros... Makes me miss Winner Ave in Columbus, and REALLY miss my old friends.
Isn't Xmas supposed to be cheery and such? Maybe it's because I feel strangely out of place? I'm not sure. The people I care most about are in Illinois, and this time of year is just harder for that reason.
Not to mention the fact that I feel discouraged about living on my own.
Gosh...
"we came for salvation. We came for family. We came for all that's good that's how we'll walk away."
Oh well- gotta keep lookin up!

Parenting- a true story

It's difficult being a parent. Yes, it's rewarding and wonderful, but it's also very, very difficult at times. I can't tell you how many times I've cried from frustration, struggled with decisions, and held back much more when dealing with my son.
Example***
Ollie goes to his father's 2 nights/week. I've been struggling with getting him on a schedule and stabilizing his eating/sleeping habits since we moved. Trying to get his father on the same page, while trying to make it work for me, too, is like pulling teeth. I can't get a break, and it doesn't help that he doesn't have his own room. I'm worried that by the time we get a place, I'll be so rundown from trying to be a good disciplinarian that I won't be able to follow through (not to mention getting him adjusted, yet again, to a new living environment).
Another example**
His teacher told me today that she's worried about his speech, and I should look into getting him to a specialist. Now, I'm not 100% surprised by this. Most people have a hard time understanding Ollie (myself included at times). It just felt like a cold jab in my heart hearing it from his teacher.

I feel like a bad mother some days, and some days I feel okay about it. Sure, Oliver has good manners and can be pleasant, but he also has anger issues (I think) and hits himself when he's frustrated. Sometimes, I worry I may be doing something wrong, and it scares me to death!
All I can do is take advice when it's given to me, and do what I think is right for my son.
I just hope what I'm doing is right. It's all I can do with what I have right now...

X

This message was sent using the Picture and Video Messaging service from Verizon Wireless!

To learn how you can snap pictures and capture videos with your wireless phone visit www.verizonwireless.com/picture.

Note: To play video messages sent to email, QuickTime� 6.5 or higher is required.

Golfing with The Finkledinks

Ahh, yes. Another glorious Saturday night in Tremont. We went to Duck island to see Dave Hammer play, and had! A! Blast! Duh, we're rockstars.
It's crazy how much fun we have when we get together! Seriously, you should meet us out next time. Totes.
****
Random thoughts:
I hate it when I lay down for bed, and realize the light was left on and I need to get oUT of my snug nest to turn it off. Lame. #justsayin
Also, I being without a vehicle. It's getting on my nerves, and I need to find/buy one asap. Now, if I could only find a decent one instead of some pos listing on Craigslist.

*le sigh* goodnight, universe. I'll catch ya later or I'll catch ya on another time...
X
A

Salon Happenings: Tuesday!

This message has been sent using the picture and Video service from Verizon Wireless!

To learn how you can snap pictures and capture videos with your wireless phone visit www.verizonwireless.com/picture.

Note: To play video messages sent to email, Quicktime@ 6.5 or higher is required.